meditation, dating and relatioships guest post

Did you know there’s a crazy link between meditation, dating and relationships? Not only can meditation make you more attractive, but it can help you to meet new people, be more confident, and enjoy longer relationships.

As a meditation teacher, one of my favourite things in the world is to show people how to use meditation for dating and relationship success.

Most of my students are amazed when I tell them that meditation can help with their dating life. After all, meditation is usually about health, not about finding your perfect lover. Yet it’s my experience that after my students have been meditating for a month or so they enjoy far better dates and better relationships.

Previously in one of our guest posts we discussed how the happiest couple meditate together, and there are reasons for that!

The Benefits Of Meditation For Dating

I know what it can be like when you’re dating and trying to find the perfect relationship. For starters, you have to avoid all the fakers and players who just want you for a few nights, and then they’re gone. There’s also trust issues. It can be difficult to let somebody in, personally. But you need to let someone in if you’re ever going to have a serious relationship with them.

And then there’s your feelings about yourself. Maybe you’re just not confident, or you have negative beliefs about relationships and believe that you will never find that special someone.

Meditation can help with all these things.

Meditation can:

For starters, one of the great things about meditation and dating is that meditation helps you to be more aware of other people.

You need to be able to see people for who they are so you can avoid the players and actually notice when someone is genuine.

When you meditate, you silence your own mind and you become more aware of other people’s actions and mannerisms. With meditation, you become more able to perceive people for who they truly are (both the good and the bad). This can help you to make more informed decisions about who you’re going to date, who you should follow up for a second date, who you should invite back to your place, and who you should straight-up get the hell away from.

Do you struggle to trust people you’re dating?

One of the worst things about dating and relationships is that when you find the right person, you’re too untrusting to actually let them in. It’s understandable. We’ve all been burnt before. But you have to let people in if you’re ever going to enjoy a positive relationship.

The problem is this: How do you overcome your trust issues so you can start a positive relationship? And the answer is: by being more insightful and correcting your thoughts.

Meditation can help you realise the different thoughts that you have about dating and relationships.

For instance, consider the negative belief that you will be hurt if you let people in. This belief is understandable. You let your ex in, and they hurt you. But the only way you will ever have a successful relationship is by letting someone in, and so you have to overcome your negative belief.

Beliefs about dating can be hard to change, partly because it’s difficult even to see your own beliefs and to hear your thoughts. Thankfully, meditation can help.

Some meditations help you change your thoughts.

Meditation techniques like Vipassana and many other practices (especially Buddhist ones) can help you to be more aware of your thoughts. For instance, when practising Vipassana you might notice that you believe that only bad guys are interested in you. Once you are aware of this thought, you can then change it by challenging it. For instance, if you think only bad guys are interested in you, remind yourself of all the good guys who have shown an interest in you, and also realise that you wrongly labelled many guys as “bad guys” simply because they were interested in you—you needed to think they were “bad” in order to substantiate your belief that only bad guys like you. So, challenge those thoughts.

Basically:

Meditation improves your confidence too.

Everyone knows that one of the most important aspects of dating is confidence. Not only is confidence the sexiest thing on earth, but you also need it to get out there and actually start dating. Thankfully, it is scientifically proven that you can train to be confident. And one way to be more confident is by meditating.

There are many meditations for confidence.

Meditation helps to silence your negative thoughts about yourself and to reduce the symptoms of anxiety, which interfere with your confidence. In fact, I often recommend my meditation students to meditate before dating, so that when they are actually on the date, they will feel incredibly confident.

And meditation makes you more attractive

Yes, meditation also makes you more attractive. It helps with numerous problems of appearance. For instance, research shows that meditation can help your body to generate new skin cells at a faster rate, which reduces the appearance of wrinkles. Plus, meditation also helps the body to grow new hair, so you get healthy-looking hair. And, as we’ve seen, it makes you more confident too, and confidence is sexy as hell.

For all these reasons, meditation helps with dating. It can even help you to find love.

And it helps with relationships too.

Meditation and relationships

If you want long and healthy relationships, try meditating. In particular, meditate as a couple.

Meditation helps relationships for so many reasons. For starters, it reduces stress and anxiety, which can cause terrible problems in relationships. Just think about the number of relationships that have led to heartbreak just because of financial stress or work stress. Imagine how much longer and healthier those relationships would have been if it weren’t for the stress. Meditation helps to reduce stress to prevent it from affecting your relationship.

Plus, meditation helps you accept your boyfriend or girlfriend / husband or wife. As we spend so much time together, it can be easy to be annoyed by little things your lover does, like not making the bed or snoring. Sometimes those little problems lead to big arguments that can lead to breaking-up. But if you meditate together you become more accepting (after all, mindfulness is entirely about acceptance). And once you accept all those little annoying things your partner does you will have far less argument.

Yes, there are numerous links between meditation, dating, and relationships. Not only can meditation help you find love, but it can help you to keep it.

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About Paul Harrison

Paul Harrison is a qualified meditation teacher and writer with more than 15 years experience in meditation and mindfulness. He studied meditation in Oxford, UK, and Hamilton Ontario Canada, and earned his degree at Staffordshire University. Paul has helped thousands of people to discover their true potential through mindfulness, yoga and meditation.

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