In our newsletter, we often to discuss how to become a free-spirited person.
How much would you be willing to let go of to have inner peace and to become a free spirited person?
Would you let go of Netflix? Your cellphone? Facebook?
Would you live a minimalist life?
In 2021, society tries to sell us our emotions, our happiness, our sense of self-worth.
We’re given labels to tell us how “successful” we are. We’re told that if we take a package holiday, buy the latest smartphones, and drive new cars, we will be happy. It’s society’s lie.
But all spiritually enlightened people know that peace comes within. Just like Buddha said, “Inner peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.”
Happiness and inner peace are not about possessions. They’re not about material gain. We need to get over these societal delusions and stop being slaves to society.
That’s why, the best way how to be spirited is to look inside yourself.
18 Ways How To Be Free Spirited
1: Let go of self-judgment
It can be too easy to obsess over how we are feeling.
We’re feeling down, so we tell ourselves everything is wrong. We start to ask “Why am I feeling low?”.
Unfortunately, when we focus on negative emotions like these, we inadvertently cause them to grow. What we focus on grows. So concentrating on negativity grows negativity.
Don’t focus on negative feelings. Focus instead on the world around you, and on living in the present moment.
2. Live for now
One of my favourite Wayne Dyer quotes is: “Peace is the result of retraining your mind to process life as it is, rather than as you think it should be.”
Accepting life as it is, letting things be, being conscious of the present moment, these all help with inner peace and happiness.
3. Let go of the past
What’s past is prologue.
Our past experiences are lessons that teach us what we need to know now. We are not our past.
Learn from the past. Use the past to inform you in the present moment, but focus on now.
4. Let go of being right
Life is not about right and wrong. There are infinite perspectives, not “right and wrong”, but a million shades inbetween.
Let go of being right.
Embrace the opinions of others; let yourself be wrong and make mistakes. Embrace it all, because it is all life.
5. Let go of bad relationships
Sometimes you have to let go of individual people. If they are meant to be in your life, they will catch up.
Letting go of bad relationships gives us the chance to make new relationships. Plus, it removes negative energy from our lives.
You won’t become a free-spirited person unless you remove negative people from your life.
6. Let go of the self
You cannot be a free-spirited person while you are forcing a false identity on yourself.
Self-obsession blinds us. Not only do we start to stress too much about our current issues, but we deprive ourselves of one of life’s best joys: helping others.
Let go of self-obsession and practice random acts of kindness instead.
7. Let go of titles and stature
Society is hellbent on giving us labels. We cannot define people by a job title or a status. People are infinite, unique, beautiful, magical beings. And you’re one of them.
Let go of job titles. Let go of statuses. See yourself for the miraculous energy that is your true being.
There are many similar things to let go of—anything that puts you in a box; let it go!
8: Let go of false positivity
We all know those people who tell us they have no regrets, no remorse, that they are always positive. And to those people I say bullshit.
We all experience low times. We have to. Because if we do not experience lows, we do not experience the full tapestry of life.
You have to recognise that negativity is a part of life. That’s the key to staying strong when bad things happen.
9. Get out of your comfort zone
Remember when you were learning to swim? Your mother held you safely in the shallow zone. Then she did the most important thing: she let go. And one way or another, you began to swim, and you made it further into the deep zone, exploring the whole pool.
That’s a great metaphor for life.
We can choose to stick in the shallow, safe, comfort zone, or we can let go and get out of our comfort zone and explore life fully.
My advice? Get out of your comfort zone. Dare to explore.
10. You’ll never be a free-spirited person until you let go of your fears
Fear is a lead weight in the vessel of the human soul. It sinks us. Don’t allow it to stop you from doing…anything.
We all know the old saying, “Feel the fear and do it anyway”. It’s famous for a reason. When we let go of fear, we liberate the positive energy within us.
Let life itself take over.
Give up control.
Embrace the wild nature of the true world.
11. Relax and you will naturally get moving again
The more rigid and stiff we are, the harder it is to move. That’s true for muscles, and it’s true spiritually, too.
Writing for Psychology Today  Leslie Becer Phelps, PhD says:
“I was walking the main trail in New Hampshire’s Franconia Notch State Park when a staff member pointed out a small path off to the side. He suggested that I check out the ‘wolf den’. It consisted of a few boulders wedged together, leaving a small covered opening to squeeze through. When he mentioned that a number of people have gotten stuck in there, I asked how he gets them out. He chuckled and said, “Well, we can’t move the rocks.” Then he explained that he just waits. After about fifteen minutes of struggling, they give up… their bodies relax and they can slip right through.”
How remarkably like the philosophies of the Buddha.
Ultimately, if you want to get unstuck in life and free your spirit, learn to relax.
Relax and accept the present moment, and you will be freed. That’s pretty much the entire philosophy of Buddhism.
12: Feel stuck in life and just go with it anyway
Right now, we might feel stuck in life. And we might trick ourselves into believing that our feelings are a reality, because your thoughts actually create your reality.
You have to stop thinking that you are stuck in your life. And to do that, you’re going to need to stop listening to your emotions.
Scientific studies have proven that emotions do not stem from rational interpretation of the facts. They’re just emotion.
In 2004 scientists asked members of the electorate how they felt after hearing a negative comment about their favourite politicians. The results showed that emotions flared after a negative comment even if that comment was founded in truth and even if it was unimportant and trivial. In other words, we get emotional about abject bullshit.
So we are feeling stuck in life. But that feeling is just a feeling and is not based on reality.
So why does it feel so real?
Emotions create feelings that in turn, create thoughts. Those thoughts, in turn, create beliefs. And what we believe we actively and forcefully try to protect, even if those thoughts are negative.
How the feeling of being stuck creates the reality
- Right now, I’m feeling stuck.
- That feeling is created by emotion.
- The emotion creates thoughts about my being stuck
- Thinking I’m stuck makes me believe I’m stuck
- The mind intentionally finds evidence to support the belief that I’m stuck
- So now I’m looking at all the evidence that says that I am stuck
- Staring at all those negatives, I now feel even more stuck.
- Return to step 1 but with even more of that feeling of being stuck.
Here’s the very big deal:
Change the emotion of feeling stuck, and you will change everything that comes after. You will change your thoughts. You will change your beliefs. You will change your actions. You will change your reality.
So: feel stuck, and do the complete opposite of what you feel like doing. You feel like staying in bed because you feel stuck in life. Go out and spend the entire day outside running through the fields (or streets).
13: To free your spirit, imagine you already are free
To change a feeling, we need to act in spite of it.
- If we’re sad, we do happy things
- If we’re angry, we do relaxing things
- If we’re feeling stuck in life, we do free-spirited things.
When you act as though you are free you will suddenly become free. If you act as though you are trapped, you will continue to feel trapped.
So what would a free-spirited person do?
- Go for a run
- Spend time outdoors
- “Just chill out, man, whatever” (relax)
- Meditate in the middle of nowhere
- Do something crazy and fun (go to a theme park, take a vacation etc)
- Spend time at the beech (for bonus points, try paddle-board yoga at the ocean)
- Do anything that you would do it you were feeling completely free in life
14: Get A Grip On Your Brain Chemicals
Remember that you are feeling stuck , and that feeling is an emotion.
Emotions are caused by brain chemicals. Change the chemicals, change the emotion.
HowStuffWorks tells us:
“Your brain is a complex network that processes vast quantities of information every second. Part of the brain’s information-processing network includes neurons, or cells that transmit signals throughout the brain. Neurons send signals through neurotransmitters, which are chemicals some release and others receive. These chemicals essentially let the parts of the brain communicate with each other. 
“The three most commonly studied neurotransmitters are dopamine, serotonin and norepinephrine. Dopamine is related to experiences of pleasure and the reward-learning process. In other words, when you do something good, you’re rewarded with dopamine and gain a pleasurable, happy feeling. This teaches your brain to want to do it again and again.
Serotonin, meanwhile, is a neurotransmitter associated with memory and learning. Researchers believe it plays a part in the regeneration of brain cells, which has been linked to easing depression. An imbalance in serotonin levels results in an increase in anger, anxiety, depression and panic. Norepinephrine helps moderate your mood by controlling stress and anxiety.”
These chemicals are incredibly important because they are affecting your emotions, and, as we’ve seen, your emotions are affecting everything else.
15: Let go of perfectionism
When you are too focused on perfection, you will feel stuck in life.
Let go of perfection. Once you let go, you become a free-spirited person.
When we are too focused on being perfect, it is usually a cover-up. We feel shameful about something. We fail to accept a part of ourselves. So we cover it up with a million imagined ways in which we are perfect, even though we are all beautifully flawed human beings.
Perfectionists feel stuck because:
- They are too concerned over their looks
- They worry too much about their careers
- They fail to accept weaknesses and work on them
- They pretend they are someone they are not (an imagined, more “perfect” version of themselves)
- They are unable to relax and have fun
Let go of perfectionism and you will stop feeling trapped in life.
16: Focus on a different goal
When we obsess over one goal in life we sometimes feel trapped, as though our entire being revolves around that one goal.
When we change goals we change our perspective. This makes us look at life in a new way, and that change of perspective creates freedom of spirit.
There are so many possible different goals to focus on.
Focus on making someone else happy
Focus on a hobby
Focus on spiritual development
17: To become a free-spirited person, let yourself be happy today
Too many people put demands on their happiness.
‘I’ll be happy when I’m successful.”
“I’ll be happy when I lose weight.”
“I’ll be happy once I have the perfect boyfriend / girlfriend”.
No. Be happy now.
Happiness leads to success, not the other way around.
18: Stop being a slave to society
Far too many people are slaves to society.
When we are born, the universe intends for us to be free and to dance through the world with the freedom of a firefly. But social pressure and peer pressure get in the way.
- You don’t have to do what society dictates.
- You don’t have to wear the clothing Vogue tells you to wear
- You don’t have to have the career your parents told you to have
- You don’t have to look the way magazines tell you to look
- You do you.
Stop being a slave to society.
I feel like I’ve freed myself again. And even if I do feel stuck in life again, I realise now that it’s just a feeling, and that the feeling does not reflect my reality.
Think I’ll go play among the stars now.
How I became a free-spirited person by letting go
I realised years ago that money does not make you happy.
I realised I had many things to let go of if I wanted to become a free-spirited person.
I promised myself I would let go of materialism. I promised I would let go of status. I promised I would let go of those labels society gives us. I promised I would give up unessential’s and focus on my inner peace.
I had read that money does not make us happy; experience does. And I knew that to become a free-spirited person I needed to let go.
I told myself that I would do the following:
- not chase after inner peace
- be content with what is
- accept life as it is
- accept imperfections
- live in the here and now.
I would find the free-spirited person inside of me. I would become a free-spirited person through sheer acceptance of reality.
Even if life wasn’t perfect, I would enjoy the moments and accept the journey of my life.
Here is what the world taught me when I learned to let go:
Inner peace is easy when you just let things be.
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1: The No Nation Generation, PATRICK GILLIGAN, https://www.movehub.com/blog/no-nation-generation/
2: More Than Half Of U.S. Workers Are Unhappy In Their Jobs, Jack Kelly https://www.forbes.com/sites/jackkelly/2019/10/25/more-than-half-of-us-workers-are-unhappy-in-their-jobs-heres-why-and-what-needs-to-be-done-now/#63626d420247
3: Feeling stuck? How to get free, Leslie Becker-Phelps Ph.D. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/making-change/201009/feeling-stuck-how-get-free
4: 5 Ways Your Brain Influences Your Emotions, CAITLIN UTTLEY, How Stuff Works https://science.howstuffworks.com/life/inside-the-mind/human-brain/5-ways-your-brain-influences-your-emotions.htm